brushfire"This, yes, this, it was always like this." -Stanley Koehler
REFLECTIONS OF AN EMPTY NESTER
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Recently I had the privilege of meeting and hearing the stories of two men who chose different paths in life, but share a common mission. They are both committed to helping young men find direction in their lives. Former Detroit Police Chief and Deputy Mayor Isaiah “Ike” McKinnon spoke to a group of teachers and administrators about schools, society and social justice. One of the first black officers to join Detroit’s police department in 1965, McKinnon recalled how a brutal encounter with white police officers when he was 14 drove him to pursue a career in law enforcement. “If you can turn your life around, you not only change your own life, you can change the lives of others,” McKinnon said. Odis Bellinger, executive director of Building Better Men, said, “I knew at 12 years old I was going to do something, but I didn’t know what.” B2M is a community-based male mentoring and leadership program established in 1991. This spring Bellinger brought the program to a local elementary and high school, sharing his core belief that every young male can be successful in life. He is author of “7 Steps to Promote the Success of Young African American Males” and “100 Effective Strategies for Single Mothers Raising Black Boys.” Bellinger spoke to high school students about privilege. “The reason it’s a privilege to come here is because I get to make an impact and get to come here and talk to 25 young guys who I know are going to be successful.” McKinnon talked about how during his years on the police force, he “saw so many young people, particularly young men, who had no direction. “It is particularly important to them to have a male figure in their lives,” he said. McKinnon was fortunate to have had his own father in his life and was active in raising his two sons, now 39 and 33. Bellinger, on the other hand, never knew his biological father and said this motivated him to help other young males cope with the pain of an absentee father. “Who in here has at least one male figure in your life you can talk to?” he asked the students. Every hand but one went up. “Who here believes you’re smarter than what you do every day?” This time, all the hands went up. McKinnon’s years as a police officer were inspired by his negative encounter with the law. "I wanted to make sure that those kinds of things didn't happen to any other people, whether it was black or white or whatever it might be,” he said, adding he devoted his career to trying to make sure there was justice for everyone. Bellinger’s work grew out of five years he spent as a correctional officer working with boys as young as 8 and 9 years old. His hope was to forge a different path for the young men he mentored. Both men believe in the importance of having a plan. “I had a plan when I was 40. I have a plan now that I’m 73,” McKinnon said. “What’s your blueprint?” Bellinger asked the North students. “Is your blueprint getting in trouble? Is your blueprint becoming the opposite of the honor roll? Is your blueprint not knowing what you want to do? A blueprint is a plan for your life.” Before concluding the session, Bellinger gave the students his personal cell phone number. “You can call me and talk to me. We can talk between us,” he said. McKinnon closed his talk by reflecting on a teacher’s lasting impact. “There will be people who will come to you sometime and say, thank you for impacting my life,” he said. McKinnon and Bellinger may never know what lives they’ve impacted. But as role models and mentors, they embody what educator and speaker Rita Pierson meant when she said, “Every child deserves a champion: an adult who will never give up on them, who understands the power of connection and insists they become the best they can possibly be.” This appeared in the June 1, 2017 issue of the Grosse Pointe News.
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Mary Anne BrushJournalist, fiction writer, wife and mother |